EDUCATED GUESS ALBUM REVIEWS
Last week, Maxim was called out for publishing a negative review of the new Black Crowes album. What's so wrong about that, you ask? Well, it turns out that the reviewer didn't actually listen to the CD before panning it.
Here's the actual "review" that ran in Maxim. Note the lack of specifics -- but also note the believable angle.
Needless to say, folks were not amused at Black Crowes HQ, and they quickly fired off an angry press release, accusing Maxim of a lack of journalistic integrity.
In response, Maxim calmly noted that, indeed, they at times evaluate a new record based on an educated guess.
Well, that did not exactly appease the Crowes camp (though in fairness to Maxim, doesn't the review sound about right to you?).
We decided to take a shot at our own "educated guess" reviews. Turns out the best part is: it's easy!
LENNY KRAVITZ -- It Is Time For A Love Revolution
**1/2 Lenny recently copped to a three-year celibacy stint, so the title is no big surprise. Neither is the music. Per usual, we have lots of warm-sounding drums, overdriven guitar circa 1978 and gritty vocals, but nothing on the record really lives up to earlier anthems like Let Love Rule or Mama Said -- even if most songs here sound just like 'em.
INTERPOL -- Cinephile Sunday
**1/2 On their third -- or is it fourth -- release, Interpol cut right to the chase and simply read off Joy Division song titles over a low, ominous bass line.
BELLE AND SEBASTIAN -- Twee Bicuspid
**1/2 The Gossamer packaging on this CD is a clue: this veteran indie band is feeling fragile. No, like, more fragile than before. Plenty of nice fluting (or is it flouting?) throughout, but in the end, the group's fanbase of poetry majors and Ren Fair enthusiasts may find Twee Bicuspid a tad precious.
RYAN ADAMS -- 6 A.M. Tear-Stained Beddy-Bye
**1/2 This 58-song triple CD will tax some listeners, but the three-and-a-half great songs here make the lengthy aural trip almost worth your time. Say what you will about enfant terrible Adams, he certainly is prolific. And then ask yourself this, if he wasn't, would we be lucky enough to get as many as six overlong albums per year from the artist -- all adding up to one solid LP of music? Next you'll expect him to edit these albums down for you. (Lazy!) Oh yes, and Whiskeytown, drugs, famous, tousled, Parker Posey breakup, blah blah blah.
MORRISSEY -- High Noon for the Sullen Barrister
**1/2 Former Smiths singer and shaman Morrissey soldiers on through these 10 pro- and anti-British anthems. He's as witty, and as miserable -- simulataneously -- as ever. But it's still not The Smiths. And we blame him for that.
Got a few "educated guess" reviews of your own? Post 'em in the comments!
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